Don't Even Think About It
The internet has been abuzz lately with a worrisome health alert. It seems
intense mental activity can trigger a rare brain disorder called
hyper-cerebral electrosis, resulting in a rather messy explosion. Chess
players and others with great powers of concentration are especially at risk.
Worried? Take the following diagnostic quiz, titled "How to Tell if Your
Head's About to Blow up." A "yes" to any three of the following seven
questions could mean that you have the disorder. The original source for the
alert and the quiz: The Weekly World News, a Florida-based tabloid. Still
worried?
1. Does your head sometimes ache when you think too hard? (Head pain can
indicate overloaded brain circuits.)
2. Do you ever hear a faint ringing or humming sound in you ears? (Is could
be the sound of electricity in the skull cavity.)
3. Do you sometimes find yourself unable to get a thought out of your head?
(This is a possible sign of too much electrical activity in the cerebral
cortex.)
4. Do you spend more than five hours a day reading, balancing your checkbook,
or other thoughtful activity? (A common symptom of hyper-cerebral electrosis
is a tendency to overuse the brain.)
5. When you get angry or frustrated do you feel pressure in your temples?
(Friends of several people who died say the victims often complained of head
pressure in times of strong emotion.)
6. Do you ever overeat ice cream, doughnuts, and other sweets? (A craving for
sugar is typical of people with too much electrical pressure in the cranium.)
7. Do you ten to analyze yourself too much? (Sufferers are often
introspective, "overthinking" their lives.)
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