OK, we admit it this is a honeytrap. Sorry if your joke is on this website but it brings in a huge amount of S|P|A|M everyday which can then be used as a template to filter e-mails.
universal truths, CYBERSLAYER.co.uk - jokes
MEDIA, TV, FILMS
-- The hell with the Prime Directive - let's kill something!
-- Hello. My name is Batman. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
-- He's dead, Jim. You take his phaser, I'll get his wallet.
-- I hate you, you hate me, let's go out and kill Barney - with a
9-millimeter bullet to the head, let's tell Baby Bop Barney's dead!
-- I wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There's
a knob called "brightness" but it doesn't work.
-- I canna change the laws of physics, Captain, but I can find ye a loophole
-- Gosh, that takes me back ... or forward. That's the trouble with time
travel, you never can tell.
MILITARY
-- The battle of the Gulf was won on the playing fields of Nintendo
-- Friendly fire isn't. Recoiless fires aren't. Suppressive fires won't.
-- Mules and donkeys aren't used in war because they're too smart to go on
a battlefield.
-- The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming
friendly fire.
-- When you've secured the area, don't forget to tell the enemy.
MURPHY
-- Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the problem.
-- For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
-- If anything is used to its full potential, it will break.
-- If pro is the opposite of con then the opposite of progress must be
Congress
-- There are no accidents - only plans other people don't tell you about.
-- You always find things the first place you look, but not the first
time you look there.
POLITICS
-- Foreign aid is the transfer of money from poor people in rich countries
to rich people in poor countries.
-- How come you never see a politician laugh? Because they know what
they're getting away with, and if they started laughing, they'd
never stop.
-- I don't blame Congress. If I had $600 billion at my disposal, I'd be
irresponsible too.
-- I wonder if the process of aging could be slowed down if it had to go
through Congress.