OK, we admit it this is a honeytrap. Sorry if your joke is on this website but it brings in a huge amount of S|P|A|M everyday which can then be used as a template to filter e-mails.
Misc Quotes (clean,non-offensive), CYBERSLAYER.co.uk - jokes
1. Pressure is playing for $50 a hole with only $5 in your pocket.
--- Lee Trevino
2. A halo has to fall only a few inches to become a noose.
--- Farmers Almanac
3. If you think OSHA is a small town in Wisconsin, you're in trouble.
4. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the pants.
--- Wilcox's Law
5. All kookies are not in a jar.
6. I never give them hell. I just tell the truth and they think it's hell.
--- Harry Truman
7. Legend --- a lie that has attained the dignity of age.
--- H. L. Mencken
8. Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your children.
9. Experience varies directly with equipment ruined.
--- Horner's Five-Thump Postulate
10. Wet manure is slippery.
--- OSHA discovery
Excerpted from Quotes, Damned Quotes and ... by John Bibby
Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they
translate into their own language and forthwith it is something
entirely different. (Goethe)
If there is a 50-50 chance that something can go wrong, then 9
times out of ten it will. (Paul Harvey News, 1979)
``Give us a copper Guv'' said the beggar to the Treasury
statistician, when he waylaid him in Parliament square. ``I
haven't eaten for three days.'' ``Ah,'' said the statistician, ``and
how does that compare with the same period last year?'' (Russell Lewis)
``I gather, young man, that you wish to be a Member of
Parliament. The first lesson that you must learn is, when I call
for statistics about the rate of infant mortality, what I want
is proof that fewer babies died when I was Prime Minister than
when anyone else was Prime Minister. That is a political
statistic.'' (Winston Churchill)