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Theology 911, CYBERSLAYER.co.uk - jokes
THEOLOGY 911 * FINAL EXAM
1. Summarize Thomas Aquinas' _Summa Theologiae_ in three succinct
sentences. You may use your bible.
2. St. Martin of Tours, Pope Clement VII and were not contemporaries.
Had they known each other, how would the history of the Reformation turned
out differently?
3. Define a moral system that satisfies Liberals, Conservatives,
Moderates, and the entire population of Ancient Rome, ca. 3 BCE.
4. Memorize the Bible. Recite it in tongues.
5. Imagine you have the stigmata. Would it affect your productivity at
work? Would you still be admitted into fine restaurants? Would it be
covered by your medical insurance, or should it constitute a pre-existent
condition?
6. What does it mean to be eternal, co-eternal, and non-existent all at
once?
7. St. Thomas Aquinas and St. Augustine of Hippo decide to rob a bank.
The note to the teller is 1,200 pages long, not counting footnotes,
complete with a promise of damnation if the teller does not accept
immediate Baptism. In the middle of the heist, they engage in an
extended debate as to whether or not the money really exists.
Are they committing a mortal or a venial sin?
8. Speculate on what the current status of salvation history might have
been if Abraham had just stayed in Ur.