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A New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA (Federal Housing Administration)
loan for a client. He was told that the loan would be granted if he could
prove satisfactory title to property offered as collateral. The title
dated back to 1803, and he had to spend three months running it down.
After sending the information to FHA, he got this reply: "We received your
letter today enclosing application for loan for your client, supported by
abstract of title. Let us compliment you on the able manner in which you
prepared and presented the application. However, you have not cleared the
title before the year 1802, and therefore, before final approval can be
accorded the application, it will be necessary that the title be cleared
back of that year."
Annoyed, the lawyer replied: "Your letter regarding titles in Case
No. 189156 received. I note that you wish titles extended further back
than I have presented them. I was unaware that any educated man in the
world failed to know that Louisiana was purchased from France in 1803.
The title to the land was acquired by France by right of conquest from
Spain. The land came into possession of Spain by right of discovery made
in 1492 by a sailor named Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the
privilege of seeking a new route to India by the then reigning monarch,
Isabella. The good queen, being a pious woman and careful about titles,
almost as much I might say, as the FHA, took the precaution of securing the
blessing of the Pope for the voyage before she sold her jewels to help
Columbus. Now the Pope, as you know, is the emissary of Jesus Christ, the
Son of God, and God, it is commonly accepted, made the world. Therefore, I
believe it is safe to presume that He also made that part of the world
called Louisiana, and I hope to hell you are satisfied."