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        Teddy Bears are better than men because...

        1.  Teddy Bears are happy to snuggle all night long.
        2.  Teddy Bears rarely have prickly whiskers.
        3.  Teddy Bears always keep your secrets.
        4.  You can always buy a bigger teddy bear.
        5.  Teddy Bears never bore you to death with details of the
            games.
        6.  Teddy Bears can hug for long periods of time.
        7.  Teddy Bears usually smell nice and are always soft and
            cuddly.
        8.  Teddy Bears hardly ever smoke and rarely even smell from
            tobacco.
        9.  Teddy Bears are perfectly willing to make long term
            commitments.
        10. Teddy Bears make excellent traveling companions.
        11. Teddy Bears sleep soundly without wriggling around,
            snoring, and hogging all the covers.
        12. Teddy Bears are not often jealous of other teddy bears.
        13. Teddy Bears never transmit nasty diseases.
        14. Teddy Bears aren't only interested in sex.
        15. Teddy Bears know when you've had a bad day.
        16. Teddy Bears love to vacation at the spot you select.
        17. Teddy Bears don't have to hide when your mother comes
            to visit.
        18. Only once in a blue moon will a Teddy Bear break your
            heart.
        19. Teddy Bears have little anxiety about their abilities
            in bed.
        20. Teddy Bears like it when you wear flannel nightgowns.
        21. Teddy Bears hardly ever complain about your bedtime
            makeup preparations.
        22. Most Teddy Bears don`t hog the whole bed.
        23. Teddy Bears never stand up their dates.
        24. Teddy Bears are never on a business trip when you really
            need them.
        25. Teddy Bears are happy to stay loyally in your bed when
            you are away.
        26. Teddy Bears get on perfectly with your pets.
        27. Teddy Bears always like your friends.
        28. Teddy Bears don't have weird eating habits.
        29. Teddy Bears invariably understand when you have a
            headache.
        30. Teddy Bears almost never complain about your
            housekeeping.
        31. Teddy Bears don't shock neighbors by their presence.
        32. Teddy Bears are rarely too young or too old.
        33. Teddy Bears don't require home cooked meals.
        34. Teddy Bears never borrow your car.
        35. Teddy Bears get on famously with all your relatives.
        36. Teddy Bears would never make fun of your anxieties.
        37. Teddy Bears aren't paranoid about catching your cold.
        38. Teddy Bears don't care a bit what you spend your money
            on.
        39. Teddy Bears are always ready to help you in an emergency.
        40. Teddy Bears never have cold hands or scratchy toenails.
        41. Teddy Bears can't possibly get you in trouble.
        42. Teddy Bears don't get suddenly amorous in the middle of
            the night.
        43. Teddy Bears love just as much the morning after.
        44. Teddy Bears never leave your bathroom a wreck.
        45. Teddy Bears don't mess up your apartment, and they
            generate only modest amounts of laundry.
        46. Teddy Bears are the safest, cuddliest people in the
            whole wide world.


		

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